I should have listened to that voice inside of me.Don't take me in for a rollercoaster ride,
'cause I'm not ready for it.
Recent events have totally drained me out, totally.
I just realised how much I mean to you.
You don't know how unbearable it is,
to find out that you're angry.
Do you know how much it upsets me to see us like that?
Loneliness is starting to take over,
& i'm not enjoying this feeling.
I'm bleeding inside of me, do you realise that?
I guess you don't.
& you never will.
I try to keep things to myself,
but my heart keeps giving itself away.
Fuck this shit.
Enough is enough.
Are you happy now?
You came in between once again.
Thank you so much.
God, why me?
Slight hope dangles on a string,
like slow spinning redemption.& then again, I'm clinging on to this thin string,
hoping it won't snap anytime soon.
'Cause I believe in us, please.
I'm sorry, I know it's wrong,
but I'm returning the hate.
You pushed me into this.
& now, there's no turning back.
My daddy just asked me what's wrong with my eyes.
& I said I was just tired.
What a total liar.
well, well. i guess xun was right. But, she disappeared just at the moment i needed her! where's my fts!? :/
i admit i was a little too harsh, but i was just being protective. is that wrong? if you were me, you would've done the same too, really. i am a nice girl. & i have been taking care of her alright, just to let you know. nothing more. it's over. i don't rake up the past. it's all just a misunderstanding too. so i don't see why things should turn out like this. in the wrong direction. i don't deny that i was partially wrong, so i shall apologise. sorry! (i mean it) okay there you go, forgive & forget.
i'm leaving everything. so long! :)
I fall between the cracks.my best friend left me fer bangkok earlier this afternoon! :(
YAY. finally went tanning with my scandal today! :D i missed her so much! the times we spent together! they were just awesome! at least it beats staying at home all day, surfing around, only to find yourself disappointed at things which you come accross. oh wells! i love qinny :D
was supposed to meet that missy at 1000H at dhoby ghaut station! but guess what! She was late! i was late too! but not as late as her! haha. realised she's sucha kuku head! lol. she doesn't know howta get to sentosa without transport by car! oh gosh! can't stand it! haha. so funny! anyway, made our way down to sentosa & we took a long time deciding whether we wanted to take bus or cable car! chose bus in the end. went to palawan beach!
it was pretty empty, not like the other times i went there. haha we chose a spot, meant only fer us! haha so perfect! but before that, we got lays salt & vinegar chips to munch on! :D pigging out, you knowww :)
halfway throughout tanning, this whole huge bunch of noisy & uncivilised group of guys started playing soccer around Our area! they were like screaming & shouting 'fuck you! fucker! CB!' all the way, like that was the Only few words in their dictionary. what a WIDE VARIETY. wow. we were both impressed by their low down behaviour. we could hardly tolerate them! freaks. & we realised that All of them had shaved heads so we guessed they just came outta army or something like that. hurr. asses!
well anyway, we tanned in the hot sun fer like ages! i could almost swear the sun was scorching deep beneath my skin! :/ it was pretty hard to bear, especially since i get sun burnt quite easily. so i kept complaining. HAHA. it was funny! took loads of photos with my scandal! :D it was so much fun! heh. (we take absolutely great photos! so artistic!) tsk tsk. haha we're so cool! ;)
oh oh! i forgot to mention! i baked cookies & i brought some fer her! & she baked cheese cake & she brought fer me too! see the sweetness of scandalism? ;) But, i have yet to complete my statement. halfway through our mrt ride down to sentosa, the cheese cake fell out of the container & spilled all over her bag. haha, not funny. so i didn't get to eat it :( but she promised to bake fer me again know! awwww. what a darling! ;)
anyway, as i was saying. haha we just lay there tanning, talking, laughing, joking & doing everything! it was so much fun! :D stopped tanning at one point cos i couldn't take the heat. so we went to 7eleven fer some air con. heh. got slurpeeeee! shared :) met someone at the shower which totally gave me a fright! should've seen my reaction! it was hilarious! i guess lady luck was just not shinning on me today :X
before we knew it, we were outta sentosa by 1500H! we were both badly burnt! haha! took many many photos again! :)) headed to town! far east please :D so sweet of her to accompany me though she was rushing off fer tution! thank you missy! :) shopped around fer awhile & then she left! i made a few trips down to far east, then heeren, then far east, then heeren Again. it was so tiring walking up & down so many times just to find something. & i was pretty stupid, come to think of it. hurrr. oh wells! i'm not complaining about anything :)
met my bestie! :D thanks fer helping me out darling! you know how much i love & appreciate you right! heh!
walked over to cine to check something & then headed home! my trip home was pretty scary! there was something wrong with the Mrt i was taking. the driver sucks! it seemed like he didn't know howta work the controls or something! the train kept jerking & all! then in the tunnel, it came to a sudden halt. it sure gave most of the people around me (including me) a huge shock. & i could sense that everyone was pretty worried & scared of the situation. i thought i was going to die! HAHA! then again, when i changed train at city hall, i Again boarded a sucky train! :/ hurrrr! what a trip home! it took me almost two hours to get home! tiring!
anyway, i've been thinking about alot of stuff! heh actually, nothing much, just my christmas wishlist! haha. i'll place it here nice & neat :) haha!
Santa, pleaseeeeeeeee! :Dchristmas wishlist!1) that white adidas watch!
2) the Rip Curl B/Stk bikini!
3) nokia N70!
4) iPod nano
5) the hot pink havaianas slippers!
6) that white Topshop skirt!
7) that pink & gold Kipling handbag!
8) that two pair of levi's! (which my dad's prolly getting me!)
9) that pink, white & grey nike dunks!
10) that red david & goliath cap!
11) i need more tops!
12) that metallic black belly stud!
okay, i guess that should be enough, fer NOW. haha! i'll add on when i remember more! right now, i'm so tired, all i can think of is sleep! haha what a pig! i know. oh wells! nights world! :)
I see you through the smokey air. It seems like you're so close but still a world away.
I walk by statues,
never even made one chip.
But if I could leave a mark,
a monument of the heart,
I just might lay myself down,
for a little more than I had.hello! i'm finally blogging! haven't updated in ages, i know! but oh wells! it's already mid december! boy oh boy, the holidays are sure passing quickly! & i'm starting to realise that i'm in secondary four next year, & i ain't doing anything about it! HAHA!
it's been a pretty hectic month! ever since this month started, not everything has been going exactly smoothly fer me. fer some reasons or another, i guess i just need time to adjust to Everything, not just that one thing. i just wonder sometimes, how fake people can get.
my whole week has been pretty packed! tanning with my scandal tomorrow i guess! can't wait to see that girl! but it means that i'll hafta wake up early! that's gonna be tough! haha. oh wells!
my Best Friend's leaving tomorrow! :( take care okay! idiottttttttt! come back in one piece alright? i love you so much! -HUGS :D
can't wait fer friday! ;)